And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
