Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize