do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
