I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
