i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize
