Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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