none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
