You're earring is so big in my mouth
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
