White coat. Heels.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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