it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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