We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
My ass is underappreciated
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Randomize
