I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
