is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
