we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize