Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
