The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
just tell him i said nine months
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
