I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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