hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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