Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Randomize
