look no pants
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
