i can't believe i had my finger in that
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
