dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
