So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize
