Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize