We're facebook friends in real life
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
