i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
