i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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