i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
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