Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
