They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
