I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
