Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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