I must be too annoying 4 u.
he thought i was a dude.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
