Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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