i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
