You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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