hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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