we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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