Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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