hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Randomize
