grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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