She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
