Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
