I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
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