love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
