they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
