you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
