Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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