69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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