I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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