What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Let's paint friendship bongs
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
